Sick ?

Well I've been so busy with the kids being sick and now myself that there hasn't been an update or post. So here is a quick update, Kira is doing better or shes just not letting it bother her much, Hayden had a fever and runny nose and he got better I thought but I guess he didn't since he's sick and not feeling good. Myself I thought that the kids got me sick and maybe they did, but right now my seasonal allergies are kicking my butt. Pat seems fine.
Not much really to say.
Kira's getting big, I can't believe it's been almost a year now. She's a talker, she only says a few words but she uses then non-stop. Mama, Dada and we think Baba means she wants the breast since she hasn't has or used a bottle. She is a big breastfeed-er, she loves the boob, but she vicious to them. She pokes, pinches, pushes and grabs at the breast.
Hayden has been going to Headstart when he isn't sick, and he loves school. I can't believe it's been 3 years. Time goes by too fast and I wish I took everyones advice on the time going by in the blink of an eye. It's scary, I miss those up all nights, cuddly munchkins, the hold me mama, I want you mama type of behavior you get from a baby. My kids are growing up so fast right in front of me and trying to take the time to enjoy it before time does fly by is hard. I miss the sweet sound of the babbles and coos when talking back to the kids, Kira does it but not like she use to.
Well I guess that's all for now, shoot me a idea to write about. Hope everyone is doing good and is in good health, (and not sick like us over here.) Have a great day.

Cloth Diapers or Disposable Diapers - Which to Pick?:

Things to think about when chosing cloth diapers or disposable diapers.

Let's start with cloth diapers.


Cloth Diapers:
Pros-                                        Cons-
1. less money                            1. can be a hassle
2. no harsh chemicals               2. can be hard to clean from stains
3. reusable                                3. can be bulkier then disposable
4. less waste for landfills          4. depending on cloth child might be allergic
5. easy to re-size                     
6. environment friendly            
                                             
                                             
Disposable Diapers:                  
Pros-                                        Cons-
1. less hassle                             1. expensive
2. neat and unbulky                  2. harsh chemicals against babies skin
3. easy to carry around             3. can fall apart
4. toss away the stinkiness       4. more rashes
                                                 5. more waste for landfills
                                                 6. have to buy another size
                                                 7. not environment friendly


For me personally I still can't really decide. I like cloth since there is no harsh chemicals that can be bad for babies skin, but I like the less hassle of disposable. So for me im on a thin line of half and half for each. I do cloth diaper but I also use disposables. I personally like making my own cloth diapers compared to buying them since it seems that I can make them for less money with still good quality.

So there's my run-down on Cloth and Disposable Diapers. Now it's your turn to tell me where you fall into the diaper line-up.

Back and Ready to Continue:

I am sorry to any of my Parenting Blog followers. I stopped blogging for a while, I had a few things come up with family. So I had a lot going on. But I hope to be back without many interruptions and I am ready to continue on blogging about Parenting.

So a quick update, I hope to have 2-3 drafted posts published by Saturday. Kira is doing good, she had a fever a few days ago and everyone is saying its because she is teething, but I'm over here saying she is almost  10 months and not a peeping tooth anywhere in that mouth of hers. Well they'll come in eventually.
Hayden will be starting Headstart School in a week or so. It will be Mon-Thurs. So he gets a 3 day break to be home doing things with his mommy (ME!) and his sister (Kira) and when daddy isn't working, daddy (Pat).

Anyway this is the end of this post be on the lookout for new posts, coming soon. Sorry again for dropping off the blogging earth. But remember if you have any questions, comments, pre-pregnancy, pregnancy,  toddlerhood ask away. Have something you would like me to blog about a topic related to pregnancy, parenting, toddlers anything comment below. If you would like other ways to contact me let me know we can set something up, email, text, facebook whatever it may be.

Well this is the end of this and remember Live, Laugh, Love, Play (everyday) with your babies and toddlers. I will try post some arts-n-crafts ideas and maybe some science ideas for play that are educational yet fun.

Discipline : to Spank or Not to Spank

OK where do I start. I'm just not sure with this topic.
I have mixed feelings on spanking. I feel that sometimes a child may need a little swat on the butt. Not to where you leave marks or the kid goes flying across the room. I remember as a kid we used to get our butts spanked for not listening and it sure got the point across. But nowadays we can't do that as cps gets called. Times outs don't always work, taking things away (like: a favorite toy or not being able to watch TV or a certain period of time) & explaining doesn't always work either, so then what else is there? I feel that taking everything away would be bad as that would mean learning types of things (like: books and educational games.)
When time outs and yelling and all that doesn't work you can put a parent at their wits end. I personally don't like putting a hand on a child in a bad way. My son is 3 and he tests the waters all the time. I just stick my ground. I don't let him get away with anything bad. I give him a warning the first time, the second time I removed him from the environment and turn his focus on something good, the third time is a time-out and the last time he gets a time-out and a either his toy cars or toy trains taken away for a little while. It doesn't always work. But I will not do to him the things that were done to me, like: eating soap for saying a bad word (wouldn't work on him anyway, as he already tries to eat soap because he says it is yummy), or a belt to the butt.
He once said the word bitch (yes I am typing out the word). In a stern voice I said we don't use that word, it's bad. He has not said it again. I am not even sure as to where he heard that word. But when it comes to bad words normally a stern voice works for him, then I explain in a toddler way of understanding the reason.

I used positive re-enforcement instead of saying no I say something like why don't we eat lunch first then play outside, or lets eat outside then play. Also time-out don't consist of him sitting by himself, but not in the same environment that caused the problem. I sit with him, then I talk to him and tell him what was not a good behavior and that I still love him always. I also ask him how he is feeling that he needs to talk about his feelings instead of acting on them and talk to him where I say I understand you are feeling mad, but you can't hit or kick or something to do with what he did at the time.

Anyway there is so much more I could say on this topic that would turn this into a 10 page book. So If I feel there is something I need or want to add I will but I will put (re-vised or re-edited in the topic title.)

Child Abuse:

Ok so this is a very upsetting topic to talk about, but it was a requested topic. So here it goes.

I've been a survivor of child abuse in more than one way. I made it through that time in my life and because of that and other things I have been through I am a much stronger person. I would never want my kids to go through what I went through and I wouldn't want any baby or child to endure the things I have gone through and have seen. It hurts me to see other children being abused and makes me think that the abuser should endure what they put that child through but 100x worse. I won't let anyone I don't have full trust in to watch either of my kids. I will not go online or around where I live to find a babysitter, these are my kids and if I want to know what’s going on with them and to know they are not being hurt or abused then it's my job to watch them. If I ever found out that the people I fully trust (meaning close family, mom/dad, oma/opa) hurt my kids purposely then I would go after them. My kids are there grandchildren or nephew/niece. I would make sure they never saw my kids again. 

I see many children being abused every day and nothing seems to be done about it. You can see it online. I never hear of what happened to the abuser and when you do hear about where or what the abuser is doing, they get/got there kids back and then the same thing happens all over again. It's really sad, and if I was the richest person alive I would make a big home with many families as one for all the abused children who had no place to go. Why have more kids in foster care when even then they are abused sometimes. All the parents that would live in the house would have had background checks and there would be cameras in place to see what was going on and how things were being handled. 

I have seen a baby want his own mother but she kept pushing him away, hitting the baby with pillows, shoes and other things and all this baby wanted was love, to be held and comforted by his own mother. I always wonder how mothers can't love their babies and would want to abuse them. Ok yeah some are too young and don't know how to handle being a parent, some have mental disease or defect, but to me that is still not a reason. Some mothers do really good then one day just snap. It's a scary thing t think about. I've seen mothers who were so upset by child abuse but then one day they themselves abused their children. It’s a sad thing but it does happen. 

I’m not sure what else to say so here are some statistics. 

Children are suffering from a hidden epidemic of child abuse and neglect. Every year 3.3 million reports of child abuse are made in the United States involving 6 million children; that’s because reports can include multiple children. The United States has the worst record in the industrialized nation – losing five children every day due to abuse-related deaths. (this is from National Child Abuse Statistics website.)

So lets start off with some other statistics.

1. Abused children are 25% more likely to experience teen pregnancy.
2. Abused teens are less likely to practice safe sex, putting them at greater risk for STDs. 
3. One-third to two-thirds of child maltreatment cases involve substance use to some degree. 
4. Children whose parents abuse alcohol and other drugs are three times more likely to be abused and more than four times more likely to be neglected than children from non-abusing families. 
5. As many as two-thirds of the people in treatment for drug abuse reported being abused or neglected as children. 
6. 14% of all men in prison in the USA were abused as children. 
7. 36% of all women in prison were abused as children. 
8. Children who experience child abuse & neglect are 59% more likely to be arrested as a juvenile, 28% more likely to be arrested as an adult, and 30% more likely to commit violent crime. 
9. A report of child abuse is made every ten seconds.
10. *More than five children die every day as a result of child abuse.
11. Approximately 80% of children that die from abuse are under the age of 4. 
12. It is estimated that between 50-60% of child fatalities due to maltreatment are not recorded as such on death certificates. 
13. More than 90% of juvenile sexual abuse victims know their perpetrator in some way. 
14. Child abuse occurs at every socioeconomic level, across ethnic and cultural lines, within all religions and at all levels of education.
15. About 30% of abused and neglected children will later abuse their own children, continuing the horrible cycle of abuse. 
16. About 80% of 21 year olds that were abused as children met criteria for at least one psychological disorder. 
17. The estimated annual cost of child abuse and neglect in the United States for 2008 is $124 billion.

Baby Food - Make Your Own?:

So today I made like 20 ounces of bananas into baby food. I have been wanting to make my daughters baby food. I want to do pees, carrots and cucumber next. But the pees and cucumber will have to be done for 5 days each before I can start going back to other foods she likes and has no problems with. She likes Bananas and Squash. Shes ok with Sweet Potatoes. Shes not crazy about Applesauce or Carrots but she will eat them, but maybe when I make them she will like mommy's baby food.


Bananas: With the bananas all I did was peal them, took the little end nipples off, cut them up into small chunks, then put them in my mini food chopper, but a blender will work better for stage one. My little girl is on stage one foods but my mini food chopper seems to make it into like a between stage 1 and stage 2 food. But Kira did wonderful with the bananas the way they were.


Carrots: With carrots I would wash, peal and cut them up into little 1/2 inch slices then boil them for about 10 minuets or until tender. After they are tender empty most of the water then (it would be up to you, but put either a dash of pure cane sugar or a pinch of salt) mix, put in a food chopper or a blender and blend until the right stage consistency. The dish up into storage containers.






NOTE* I will add more later and as I find what I feel is better or is easier. I will tell you this, if you don't have a blender, or you do things by hand with one of the store bought hand mills it will be very time consuming. I will do a review later on the Baby food hand mill that I have.

Munchkin Mesh Teether/Feeder (Review):

This is my review on the Munchkin mesh teether/feeder.

Fresh Food Feeder

A safe mesh feeder to jumpstart healthy eating habits - because fresh food from a feeder beats fast food from a jar. It's the little things^®. (right off the munchkin website)

I only posted the orange/pink as that is the one I bought my daughter. But they do have 3 other colors if I remember correctly. Ok give me a min and I’ll post the other colors and at the bottom of my review post other pictures. There’s green/blue, and yellow/green.

There are other similar types out there like the Sassy Teething Feeder and the Baby Safe Feeder Starter Kit. I only have the Munchkin one, as I really didn’t want to wait to get it and Wal-Mart only had the Munchkin one.

Let’s start out with the Cons: only 1 for me is that it doesn’t have a cap like the sassy one does. The only other thing but it really doesn't bother me much is it can be very messy, but they all can be.

Pros: I absolutely love this mesh teether/feeder and so does my daughter. She loves when I freeze pears, bananas, squash and sweet potatoes. I haven’t tried any other foods yet, but I am going to try cantaloupe once it’s ripe enough. You can buy either a package of 1 or 2.

I really like that I can give Kira fresh food or freeze fresh food and give it to her in the Mesh feeder and not risk a choking hazard. Of course you still have to watch your child with the mesh teether/feeder, and before giving it to your child make sure there are no tears in the mesh and that it is not coming apart, but that’s with everything from binky’s to bottle nipples.

I have told my friends and family who have a teething baby or toddler and they went out and bought one and they love it too. They are so happy they asked me what I was doing to help Kira and her teething. They said their child was miserable from teething and nothing was working but once they tried the frozen foods in the mesh feeder their babies felt better.

It’s very easy to use, not too hard to clean. To use just clasp the little pins and push down, put the fresh fruits or veggies in, or the frozen food and close the top. To clean just open the tops run warm water through while rubbing the mesh between your fingers, soak in hot water for 5 minutes then run hot water through or put it in the dishwasher (top rack only).

Just a Quick Update:

I have 4 posts & 1 review that are not published I have not finished them yet. I will finish asap. Thanks for you & patience.

Topic - Breastfeeding:

I breastfed my son and I am breastfeeding my daughter. I personally feel that breastfeeding is healthier then formula. I personally don't trust formula.


Reason: Scientists. Key words here, Science and tests. Now not all science is bad, but it's not all good either. Think of it this way: most scientific studies and testing are done on rats, mice, dogs, cats, rabbits, non-human primates, guinea pigs and farm animals. Mainly mice and rats are used. Roughly 90% of testing is done on mice and rats.


Anyway I feel that breastfeeding brings about a stronger and closer bond between mother and child. Breastfeeding is a natural, safer and better food choice for babies. Otherwise why else do our bodies produce milk? Here are a few reasons as to why I say that breastfeeding is a better food choice.

• Mother's milk is rich in nutrients and disease-fighting antibodies. 

• Lymphocytes that help babies resist infections and help to protect from allergies. 

• Lowers your stress levels. 

• Women have a greater chance of not suffering from ovarian or breast cancer. 

Now I want to bring up a highly controversial, talked about, brought-up and criticized topic. Breastfeeding: How old is too old? So just how old is too old to still be breastfeeding your child? Well that depends on what you and your child feel. I personally want the breastfeed at least till the age of two years or until my child weans. Whichever comes first.

With my son I breastfed until he started weaning himself at 13 months, by 14 months he was done breastfeeding. Now what I really wanted but I didn't tell him he had to stop, he stopped all by himself. I left it up to my child.

I am still breastfeeding my daughter at 6 months. I am leaving the choice up to her. I will least breastfeed until she is one, plus she won't take any formula (which I am happy about), as we had to try it since when she was 3 months old I got really sick and my supply dramatically dropped. But it didn't matter how hungry she was or what formula we tried, she just would not take it. So she really didn't eat much for 2 days, even though I kept giving her the breast. I kept pumping throughout the day but the most I would get was 2 or 3 ounces total a day. But I didn't give up and now she's 6 months and healthy. Kira is getting as much milk she needs to keep her healthy and full. 

So, how old is too old to be breastfeeding? It's all up to you and your child. But unless you don't want to continue to breastfeed, I would leave that choice up to your child(ren).

Raising a Child with a Disability:

Meet my son Hayden James, who was born on July 12, 2009 at 11:48am weighing 7lbs 10oz and 22in long.  Hayden was born with Spinal Bifida or as the doctors called it Meningocele, were a cyst on the thoracic vertebrae-T4 was pooling up with spinal fluid, because the spine had not fully closed. He had to have surgery to fix it. For the first 3-4 months of Hayden's life he was not allowed to do things other babies were able to do. 

Just after I delivered Hayden the doctor and nurses said ut-oh. They told me nothing for the first 15 minutes. I was upset and worried when I heard them say that, so I kept asking what was wrong, they still didn't tell me until, I got up off the delivery bed and walked over to my son, that's when they showed me his back and told me not to touch my son and that they had no idea what was wrong with him. They needed to have a special ultrasound technician do an ultrasound on his back. We were told that the ultra sound was going to be done Monday morning but the guy that does the ultrasounds was called in so we were able to have it done late Sunday night. Monday morning we got the results from the ultrasound and the technician said it looks like the liquid that formed the cyst was coming from the spinal column and that they would have to have Albany Medical unit come down and look at him and transport him to Albany Medical Center in the NICU unit. Pat and I have been both worried about what’s going on with our son and we both just want him 

better so we can just take him home with us. 

On July 13th 2009 Hayden left in the transport unit before Pat and I (even though I was supposed to go with him, they didn't let me). We left the hospital at 12:30 and went to Wal-Mart to go get my meds that they gave me at the hospital and left for Albany at 1pm on Monday. We got to Albany and found the Ronald McDonald house and we are able to stay there to be able to go visit our son 24 hours a day anytime we want to and we can get a shuttle bus to the building that he is at. Everyone that we have met at the Ronald McDonald house here has been great to both of us. When we both got all settled in and got some food in us we went to see our son for the first time since he had left Oneonta and once we walked in the door to the nursery that he is in he started yelling and we bout though it was kind of cute that he knew that we were there. We were told by the doctor or nurse that's taking care of him at the time that he was on the list to have an MRI done to find out what exactly is going on and what they’re going to do to fix it. We left and ended calling back up at 10pm to see how he was and we found out in a few minutes he was going to be going down for the MRI and to try back in about 1 hour and 30 minutes. Pat and I ended up going back to the hospital at midnight to see how he was and to tell him goodnight. When we got there the nurse had told us that he moved too much and tomorrow (July 14th) that they would have to give him a stronger sedative and try the MRI again.  

July 14th 2009 at 4:30pm, about 20 minutes after we had just got back from the hospital, we found out that Hayden stayed still enough for them to take the MRI. The Neurosurgeon reviewed the MRI and told us that there seems to very low risk of any neurological damage when they go into surgery tomorrow morning at 7:30 am. We were also informed that the surgery should go easy it does not look to be anything complex. In the surgery what they have to do is to go into the spinal column and fix a defect and cut away some of the skin on his back where the cyst is and pull the skin over so it’s a true skin on the outside.

On July 15th 2009 Hayden went in for surgery at 7:30am, it took 6 hours until the surgery was done. During that time I was told by his doctor and the nurses to go get some rest and they would call me when he got out surgery. I tried to sleep but every-time I fell asleep I had nightmares, It was an un-restful and agonizing 6 hours which seemed like forever. I was so scared when he went in for surgery, because I didn't know what was wrong with him or if during the surgery something went wrong. He had surgery and the doctor said it went great. They were able to go in and seal the spinal column up. Dr. Waldman said there was one nerve fiber that was in the cyst but it was not active and doing anything. The other part of the surgery was that they had to remove the skin that was part of the cyst and pull his back skin together and sew that up. Hayden went back to the NICU room and was on a breathing tube until he woke up and they are comfortable that he can start to breathe on his own again. With the results of the surgery there are still a few risks like of infection, but the results also made Pat and I relieved that everything went well. It was hard for me not to be by his side all the time after his surgery. It was hard for me to see my baby boy hooked up to all those tube and machines, I cried every time I saw him like that. Seeing the machines and the tubes hooked up to him made my heart break even more. I keep thinking the worst but keep telling myself everything would be okay, he's as strong as his mommy, if not stronger and that he would pull through. We all would get through this hard time. I told him he wasn't alone and that we were there for him. I just kept talking to him, holding his hand and I breastfed and gave him as much kangaroo time as I could. His surgeon said that was great for me to do, that it would help him in the healing process, due to the touch and comfort of his mama.

On July 19th 2009 we got news that we would get to take Hayden home tomorrow on July 20th 2009. We stayed the night at the hospital in what’s called the Room in room with him and he is not hooked up to anything. 

One thing that is very upsetting is that doctors would ask me why it was never caught by an ultrasound. My answer is always the same, 'I didn't know it what spinal Bifida was or that it could be caught by an ultrasound and they should talk to the ultrasound technicians because I'm not an ultrasound technician. 

He walks and talks just fine, and he performs tasks at his age level or a bit above his age level. Hayden is not disabled, at least in my eyes; he was born with a disability. I'm not trying to make light of Spinal Bifida and it wasn't always easy. I would say a disability would be something that causes a task to not be accomplished. But that is just my point of view and opinion. 

I have to say this much. I went to Early Intervention Partners and Parents meetings. They were extremely helpful. I made new friends, like: Ruth F., Michele D., Karen S., Shannon T. (others include (Initials only): BT, KRT, CAS, MS, SM, TJ and TH. They are wonderful people. And I am happy that I met them and became friends with them, they all opened my eyes and helped me in some way or another. 

Quick Post:

So tomorrow I am going to write about 2 things as a parent that I have or am dealing with. 1. Raising a child who has Spinal Bifida. 2. Defending my kids.

I Hate You Mommy:

So on 5/8/12 I got Hayden upset and mad at me.
My mom was here with the dogs and Hayden had a worker from E.I. coming so my mom went to put the dogs in the other room so they couldn't jump on the worker. Well i was trying to joke and mess around with Hayden and I said, we were throwing the dogs away. He got extremely upset and said, 'noooo.' Mind you I said it in a joking way. So I said it again and Hayden started crying. I tried to tell him I was joking and he said, 'NOT JOKING!' at the top of his lungs still while crying. So i kept trying to tell him I was joking and messing around and he just kept crying and saying not joking. Then after my mom got done putting the dogs in the other room I said to Hayden that they were just in the other room and at that moment my almost 3 year old.son said, 'I Hate You Mommy!'
So while Hayden was playing games with the worker I went into his room laid on his bed and held his monk-monk (which used to be my stuffed monkey) and cried. Finally when Pat came in he asked what was wrong and when he finally got me calmed down I told him that Hayden hates me. Now I knew that Hayden really didn't hate me but I still took it to heart. Pat said Hayden doesn't hate you and I said, 'Yes he does.' So Pat took me into the living room and asked Hayden, 'Hayden do you hate mommy?' Hayden said, 'Yes!' So then Pat asked Hayden, 'Hayden do you love mommy?' and Hayden said, 'No!' I was really upset.
My mom tried explaining to me that he doesn't understand that I was joking or what joke was. Then after me and mom got done talking I went inside and pulled Hayden into my arms and was hugging him and I explained that mommy was just trying to joke/kid around, that I was sorry to upset him and that I wasn't trying to hurt his feelings. Hayden then said, 'It's okay mommy.' I said, 'I love you Hayden!' and then Hayden hugged and kissed me and said, 'I love you too mommy.'
So a bit of advice, if your toddler is attached to something and loves something that much, what ever you do, don't try to say something that could upset him/her. They really don't understand the meaning of a joke.

The Mom Pledge:

The Mom Pledge

I am a proud to be a mom. I will conduct myself with integrity in all my online activities. I can lead by example.

I pledge to treat my fellow moms with respect. I will acknowledge that there is no one, "right" way to be a good mom. Each woman makes the choices best for her family.

I believe a healthy dialogue on important issues is a good thing. I will welcome differing opinions when offered in a respectful, non-judgmental manner. And will treat those who do so in kind.

I stand up against cyber bullying. My online space reflects who I am and what I believe in. I will not tolerate comments that are defamatory, hateful or threatening.

I refuse to give those who attack a platform. I will remove their remarks with no mention or response. I can take control.

I want to see moms work together to build one another up, not tear each other down. Words can be used as weapons. I will not engage in that behavior.

I affirm that we are a community. As a member, I will strive to foster goodwill among moms. Together, we can make a difference.  

Just Starting Out: (Re-Edited)

So this blog is going to be about things I deal with as a parent, my opinions and views, my kids and anything else about parenting.

If you would like to request me to write about an experience or how I would deal with something as a parent or questions or concerns as a parent or an expecting parent, anything parenting or pregnancy, please don't hesitate and feel free to comment. I will also do reviews on baby, toddler, pregnancy or parenting products. Let me know if you would like me to review something. If I don't have that particular product but I have something similar I will let you know. Otherwise I will try to get that product or ask someone in my family who may have that product, if I can try it out for a few days.

I am a parent to 2 beautiful kids. Hayden James (my son) born in July of 2009 and Kira Skye (my daughter) born November of 2011. If you would like to know more about my kids feel free to ask in a comment.

I am still considered new to parenthood, but I am learning everyday. I love my kids and I will continue to love them, care for them and help them thrive in a world of opportunities. I want them to reach for the stars and know they can accomplish anything they set there minds on.